"Movin' Out's" presence at the Golden Gate Theatre in some ways makes rock more respectable, and yet, since theatregoers are notoriously aged - 44 years-old on average, according to a recent Broadway survey - the popularity of these quality-free confections merely reinforces the changing role of rock in society, from the voice of rebellion to the voice of your Grandpa Joe.

Grandpa Joe may enjoy "Movin' Out." You will not. You're not supposed to.

Of course, youth isn't everything, but let's face it: Youth is the quality America associates with excitement, relevance, originality, and change. These are not qualities that abound in musical theatre nowadays - certainly Brecht and Weill's "Threepenny Opera" was edgy by 1928 standards, but by 1963, when Bob Dylan roamed Greenwich Village, it seemed unlikely that he and Joan Baez would drop by Broadway to see a "West Side Story" matinee. That would be the equivalent of, say, "Dan The Automator" and his girlfriend going to see, say, "Movin' Out."

Dan has the right idea: Honestly, nothing but sheer age-induced absentmindedness (or seen-it-all ennui) would explain why people would willingly sit through this travesty of a high-concept so-called "story-ballet" without throwing tomatoes at the stage.

"Movin' Out" really has nerve, since, unlike its conceptual forebear "Mamma Mia!" (which jammed Abba songs into a silly plot about a Greek vacation), it purports to be social commentary. Set during the Vietnam War, "Movin' Out" uses Joel hits such as "Just The Way You Are" and "Uptown Girl" to tell a story of love, loss, and post-traumatic stress syndrome, and amazingly, the music isn't even the worst thing about it. Since the tale is told in dance sequences, it lacks a script (good or bad). The narrative is cobbled not from Joel's lyrics (which barely match the action), but from a hazy mélange of clichés about America in the '60s. The costumes are hideous. And the choreography, by the normally inventive Twyla Tharp, is uninspired.

All this would make for your mere run-of-the-mill lame show, but the sight of effete male dancers pretending to be killer Marines while high-kicking to the upbeat tune "We Didn't Start The Fire" is laughable, if not downright offensive. Rock - even lousy rock like Joel's - is about raw individuality, teen angst, and escapism. To couple it to the historical past, particularly an event as troubling as Vietnam, is to turn both the music and the history into parody, or worse. It's hard to see what differentiates "Movin' Out" from a Saturday Night Live skit. Nevertheless, this type of production - one that raids rock's coffers for pre-written musical material - is doing extremely well on Broadway right now.

Stuart Malina, musical director of "Movin' Out," explains that both rock and theatre are looking for new markets: "Broadway is sort of its own genre, so I think there are people who aren't familiar with [Joel] who might come to a show like this and discover they like him, while there are Billy Joel fans who might say, 'I never thought I'd go to a dance production.' It's really good for everybody - it gives us all a broader audience."

Thus the Abba-themed "Mamma Mia!" has enjoyed huge success, as has the Queen vehicle "We Will Rock You," which will make its touring debut at a Las Vegas casino later this year. The Beach Boys Broadway musical debuts in early 2005. "Movin' Out," meanwhile, has enjoyed rave reviews and won numerous awards. And even in a economy famous for killing a number of Broadway shows, the Joel debacle has run on Broadway for the last two years. Malina points out examples of this rock-as-theatre trend will only multiply - he mentions Bruce Springsteen, Elvis Costello, and Joe Jackson as possible future muses, while a John Lennon musical is near completion - because "it's an easy idea, and it's been really successful." But he adds that doing musicals with pre-written material has both good and bad elements: "The potential upside is that the songs are known and beloved, but the potential downside is huge." In the case of "Movin' Out," he explains, "If it had sounded like a musical/theatre version of Billy Joel songs - you know, a chorus of voices, a pit band with new orchestrations - that would have been a disaster. It would have sounded like elevator music."

Instead, "Movin' Out" uses a Billy Joel impersonator - Irish Boyzone coconspirator Darren Holden - to sing 26 Joel songs pretty much exactly as you know them on record, with only subtle tempo and arrangement changes made to accommodate the dancing. But that only solves one problem: Additionally, as Malina says, "There is no plot except what the dancers convey. We needed to make a connection between the words and the emotions - strike a balance between a literal and a figurative approach."

What the show's brain trust sought to avoid, he says, was the effect of those early music videos, wherein a singer lip-synchs the words while the song's action is acted out in the background. It takes a little adjustment, he adds, for the audience "to listen to the songs and not think about them literally. At the same time, it helps us that [the audience] sees Brenda & Eddie [two characters named in the song "Scenes From An Italian Restaurant"], and knows who they are already."

On paper, this may sound like a reasonable proposition. It's only when translated to the stage that you see the catch: When performed by actors, dancers, and ballerinas, the essential sincerity of rock gets swallowed up by the essential falseness of theatre. "Movin' Out" is a case in point: With its truly inflated sense of high-art-meeting-blue-collar rectitude, it inadvertently proves that rock has no business placing itself outside the context of the radio, the iPod, or the concert arena. Indeed, you could argue that the juxtaposition of rock and roll music with theatre - be it musical comedy, drama, or ballet - is a sure sign that rock, once a powerful cultural force, has become a bourgeois art form. Even today, the theatre is a venue of social power, whereas the nightclub, arena, or stadium is still idealized as the gathering place of the powerless proletariat. In that sense, rock's leap up the social scale may signify a transference of that power, but it does so at the cost of aesthetic judgment.

This doesn't mean that rock has no place in the theatre - it's just that its place isn't exactly musical. Greil Marcus, whose book "Lipstick Traces" was turned into a play by the theatre group "Rude Mechanics," posits that the reason rock theatre is so bad has more to do with the unspoken bond between audience and performer. "Theatrical theatricality and rock and roll theatricality are completely antithetical," he says. "One can't be translated into the other. You can see this on American Idol, where the gestures are theatrical, not rock." At the theatre, he concludes, "The audience is not trusted at all to get anything, so everything is spelled out for them."

Conversely, rock bands and their audiences are on the same wavelength - they're in on the joke, or the message, or whatever. Meanwhile, these musicals beg the question of what rock music - if any - would make a good musical. "Mamma Mia!", though flimsy, wasn't offensive, and by all accounts "We Will Rock You," which features the antics of characters named Scaramouche & Fandango, is good for a few yuks. So, clearly, a kitschy quality is a necessary ingredient in these types of productions: Def Leppard might work (hell, yes, it might work), as might Aerosmith or Boston or Morrissey or Britney Spears. The danger signal flares up only when the pilfered music actually means something to people. Joel is on the cusp of being this type of artist, which is why the success of "Movin' Out" is so frightening: Now the culturally relevant songs of Springsteen, Dylan, Steve Earle, and Johnny Cash could, and probably will, fuel the librettos of upcoming musicals.

For younger fans, Prince, Metallica, and even Radiohead could probably eventually suffer the theatre treatment, and one waits breathlessly for the first rap musical. (Tupac seems particularly appropriate.) None of these possibilities are desirable: I hate to sound like a purist, but collaboration with other oeuvres has never been rock's strong point. So let's keep Radiohead offstage.

"I wrote it as a piece to be used for a carousel ride," he said Wednesday. "I'm hoping to get it re-recorded on a calliope."

And he's hoping to help save the carousel from languishing in pieces inside a hangar at Mitchel Field and have it relocated to Oyster Bay, where his waltz could entertain children as they once again ride Nunley's Carousel.

Joel has signed on as honorary chairman of a committee formed last month by the Oyster Bay Main Street Association, a nonprofit civic improvement group formed in 2001. Its goal is to persuade Nassau County, which owns the carousel, to relocate it to Theodore Roosevelt Memorial Park on Oyster Bay Harbor.

The nonprofit group acted after the county's prior plan to restore the carousel and make it part of the museum row near the Cradle of Aviation Museum stalled.

The carousel had been located at Nunley's Amusement Park in Baldwin, which closed in 1998, after being moved from its original home in Brooklyn more than 50 years earlier. It was built in 1912. The county went to court to force the owners to sell it to the county for $854,400 in 1998. The county planned to have a private operator restore and run the carousel, but nothing has happened.

"The park needs a centerpiece and we also need to attract families," said Joel, who lives in Centre Island, across the harbor from the park.

While Joel said his involvement will be limited, he has already pitched the idea to County Executive Thomas Suozzi, whose spokesman said the county is considering the idea.

But the proposal faces sizeable hurdles.

Some civic leaders think it is inappropriate for the park or would draw too many tourists. And there is a question of whether it would violate the 1942 deed of gift when the Theodore Roosevelt Association donated the land to the town. The deed bars activities not in keeping with a memorial for the former president.

John A Gable, executive director of the Theodore Roosevelt Association, said "this would require the permission of the Theodore Roosevelt Association because it involves a modification of the deed of gift, and we have not considered it."

Marie Knight, president of the Oyster Bay Civic Association and a board member of the Main Street Association, argues that the deed bars carousels anywhere in the park.

But supporters say the deed bars carousels only as part of carnivals or that a prohibition might only apply to the central part of the park where a plaque and flagpole honor TR, not the outer areas where there are already ball fields.

Beyond the deed question, Knight said, "we don't want the tourism there. We want the tourism at the Western Waterfront."

Joan Mahon, executive director of the Main Street Association,said supporters feel placing the carousel near the business district would advance the group's agenda of revitalizing the hamlet and opening up the waterfront to visitors.

"It would be a way to turn an area around and bring some more life there so it becomes a safe family place," Mahon said.

Town Councilman Chris Coschignano, who chairs the town advisory board for the park, said the board would have to review the proposal. "I understand the merits of it, but I would be concerned about whether it's appropriate in the park," he said.

Ian Siegel, a spokesman for Suozzi, said "the county executive is committed to restoring this beautiful piece of Nassau's history to its former state."

"It fits in perfectly with our historic village," said Claire Bellerjeau of Pleasant Valley Gallery & Gifts. "It does. There's no doubt about it," agreed Peter.

Chris Bellerjeau added, "I think it would be so much fun. Anything that encourages people to get out and walk around town is good and that's a big reason." He suggested a good location might be the town owned Capone property, the parcel between the Western Waterfront and the Town parking lot at the boat basin.

Peter had a second thought about the location. He said the carousel is "mechanical and aged and the salt air will play havoc with the works. That was the problem at the Coney Island amusement park."

Another local resident suggested a good location might be south of the marina parking lot and east of the picnic shelter where a small parking lot is located. He was concerned that the central area of the park is being well used for recreation by a large portion of the downtown inhabitants. They have been using the area as a sports field as well as using the barbecue units for picnics.

He said, "Before anyone puts a carousel in the northern end of the park have them - whoever - visit the park on a Saturday and Sunday and realize the way the park is being used in keeping the spirit of what the TR park is all about. Perhaps they should rethink the location. It really needs study. I'm not opposed to the carousel, but they should rethink the location."

The carousel committee (in formation) includes: Chris Robinson, president of RMS Engineering; architect Joe Reilly, president of Reilly Associates; Tina Lewis and Rob O'Brian, owners of Wild Honey restaurant (located in the Moore's building owned by Mr. Gluck); Nick Voulgaris III, Main Street board member and Promotions chair; Gene Pelland, Oyster Bay resident and boating enthusiast (and captain of the Redhead, Billy Joel's boat currently docked at the western waterfront pier); Andy Tini, past district governor, Rotary International and Lance Elder, CEO of Education & Assistance Corporation. Honorary committee members include Peter Tilles of the Tilles Development Corporation, said Ms. Mahon.

MSA said the following people have been formally or informally spoken with for their support: Claudia Oaks, director of the museums a Mitchel Field; Chris Coshignano head of the TR park committee; Peter Schmitt, NC legislator minority leader; Judy Jacobs, NC majority leader; Stephen Marx, attorney, counsel to the supervisor John Venditto; Ian Siegel, chief assistant to County Executive Tom Suozzi.

There is a great deal for residents to consider about the carousel decision and the use of the park. Charles Doering, chair of the Oyster Bay Civic Association TR Park Committee objects to the carousel on grounds that the park is supposed to be for passive use. "The current ball field was built in early 1970s and was supposed to be a temporary ball field according to a May 13th, 1969 town resolution," he said. "The park is not to be turned into Disneyland. The residents don't want an influx of people into this residential area."

While the project is still in the conceptual phase, Main Street has begun the process of working with representatives of various community organizations to understand all of the issues involved. Those representatives are from such local organizations as: Friends of Locomotive 35; Friends of The Bay; the Oyster Bay Historical Society; The Oyster Bay Civic Association; Island Properties, LLC; the Theodore Roosevelt Association; the Town of Oyster Bay and Nassau County. Each group has been asked to identify their list of requests and constraints that need to be considered. Main Street envisions the project to follow a public process, involving the local town and county government, community groups, businesses, families and property owners in developing the ideas further.

Ian Siegel, director of constituent affairs for Nassau County Executive Thomas Suozzi confirmed that the county received a request from the carousel committee for the Nunley Carousel. He said, "The fact is that the Nunley Carousel has been neglected and mismanaged for the past 10 years. It is sitting in a warehouse/hangar aging. The county executive is committed to restoring this beautiful piece of Nassau's history to its former glory and since a request has been made by this group in Oyster Bay, at this time we are considering their request - no more, no less," he said.

Presently, the county is compiling a list of people interested in the project and they will be getting back to them after they make a decision on what they plan to do. Mr. Siegel said, "We are getting calls from people asking if there is a fund set up, saying they want to give money for the project." There have been no other requests for the carousel, he said.

The Nunley Carousel

The Nunley carousel is 50 feet in diameter with 42 painted animals all horses, except for one lion and two chariots. It also has an organ. In 1997, the carousel was to be restored by the Friends of Long Island Heritage for Mitchel Field and Billy Joel was involved in that idea.

The Nunley Carousel was built in Brooklyn in 1910 by Sol Stein (who did the heads and legs) and Harry Goldstein (who did the horse's musculature) in what, according to an article in The New York Times on September 17th, 1995, "in the Coney Island tradition" of having big strong wild horses. The men also created the Central Park carousel at 65th Street. The Nunley Carousel was located on Sunrise Highway in Baldwin for 56 years as part of an amusement park. The Lercari brothers, Stephen, Lou and Jack owned the property starting in 1964, and in 1995 they decided it was time to sell the carousel. The public was concerned at the prospect of losing the carousel and in response to a public outcry, then Nassau County Executive Tom Gulotta kept it off the auction block fearing it would be dismantled and sold in pieces. Instead the county purchased it in 1998 for $854,400.

There have been people interested in buying the carousel over the years. According to The Times article, in 1993 King Kullen wanted to buy the site and keep the carousel "in a glass room." At one time Anthony Gentile of Adventureland wanted the carousel and offered $500,000 for it for his East Farmingdale amusement park site.

"It's on the most coveted part of the harbor," says Joel's broker, Biana Stepanian of Allan Schneider Associates. "It's a historic property that's had a total reconstruction. It was old and frail, and Billy brought it back in a spectacular way. It's like a cozy captain's quarters."

The singer was equally effusive in describing the property to The Post last November 2003.

"I bought two properties in Sag Harbor right on the harborfront," Joel says. "One was an antique store that was still zoned for residential use. Then I bought the place next door that was a bait-and-tackle shop, which was zoned commercial. So I've got this incredible residential space and two docks on the harbor and this big balcony and this great view. And it's just...great!"

Joel's tenure on the East End ranged from the stunning sale of his East Hampton home to Jerry Seinfeld for a record-breaking $32 million to a series of car accidents that raised eyebrows.

Stepanian, who's known Joel for decades, said the balladeer was "moving on with his life and on to the next opus," after getting engaged to 23 year-old Kate Lee and moving into his spectacular $22 million home in Centre Island last January 2003.

Two weeks ago, Joel sold his Shelter Island home - a four-bedroom waterfront manse - for close to its $4.9 million asking price.